The torture of keeping mum

There are days when my head just refuses to cooperate with me. Today was one of those. Why? I have no idea. Just that so many thoughts flash along and I am usually left gawking at the speed at which they travel (understandable as this is not a common occurrence). 

I marvel at all those individuals who can keep track of their thoughts or on the alternative let them be and not speak out about them. I can’t. I need answers/explanations and I need them immediately.  And I need to share. Especially, if the thought is important(according to me). I always wonder how a few of my friends can keep mum for hours (mostly the guys). I mean, does it not hurt to keep all your thoughts in your head? (Unless of course you are one of those people who has no thoughts…and I don’t want to mention names for obvious reasons)

It is at times like these that I think of my dad. My dad is one of those amazing people who can say absolutely nothing for a whole day. I imagine it is because I could speak the ears of my whole family. I wonder if he was bombarded by thoughts like these and with the noise quotient from outside (me), he may have thought it better to let it pass.

Someday soon, I am going to ask him. But then he may do the guy thing and not respond as he sometimes does. I think all fathers should be banned from doing the guy thing and as daughters; we should have rights into our dad’s minds because it is important. I often wonder if maybe that will force him to tell me why he prefers to keep things to himself. Though I may not want to know too much about what he thinks of me (on that count, I’d rather be oblivious).

May be some day I will tell him that I would have liked to hear what he had to say (even if he had to shut me up forcibly to say it). And so is it with my friends. I want to tell them that letting me know what you think does not mean letting go of yourself. It just means you considered me important enough to tell me your thoughts.

True luv...what a croaker...

Ok..so what got me started off on this one? well, one of my friends was telling another one of my friends that they would find true love. I mean I wish him all the best too but mann...tru luv? To me it is more like a curse. A curse that I might possibly welcome be it laid on me. But when I am not bedazzled by it, a curse nevertheless.

Tell me, what else would provoke us (and I don't mean just women here) to do the most crazy things possible? I mean, imagine someone who'd wake up at 5 in the morning to write his girl friend an SMS, so that when she got up at 6....that would be the first thing she saw. Imagine doing this for a couple of years when they were together and for a few months even after she told him that she had met someone else. Or a woman who'd cook and clean for her boyfriend and two of his room mates while she was not even living with him?

Ok why examples...I've done pretty crazy stuff myself. But in my case, I will also plead that I will do the same crazy stuff(may be not to the weird extent) for all the loved ones in my life too...but then I am a little wacky and not a good example to take.

But coming back to the point...why would you want to have true love. Is it not enough to have people you love in your life. I guess we allude to those special moments between a couple that we miss sometimes when we do not have the "one". But believe me when I tell you, those moments pass. In actuality, when i remind myself of the horror of commitment, the moments pass faster.

I have people who tell me that I will understand as I grow older and I am alone. My thought? Do they actually think that having someone with me is going to make me "love" growing older. I shudder at the thought everyday that someone might end up being witness of my doddering wackiness when i am truly ancient. I'd rather that I have no witness (that I know intimately) when I loose bowel control...or end up with alzheimers.

So I think Sonia Gandhi is great...sue me.....

What is the problem with people? I mean what is this hate campaign against Sonia Gandhi. Really? She is a foreigner...OH man...look at her WE KNOW....She has not changed her name on her passport...who the hell cares. If calling her Sonia worked for Rajiv Gandhi and his family, who the hell are we to question it. Do we not have anyone else in India named Sonia? oh come on...

And then this whole crap about her parentage. I mean, whose business is it but hers. If someone were to question my parentage, I would be really offended. Is this the great Indian culture that I am a part off? Do we now start accusing our daughters-in-law cause they were not born in our house, within our communities or may or may not have questionable parentage? Where is our compassion or our pride. Look at her. Look at her children. Look at what she has achieved. I think she is great....

And then the idiocy of her not changing her name in the passport....I was married and I never felt the need to change my name (and a good thing it was too...). It is my wish.

You don't want her as your leader. Fine. Don't elect her. But stop besmirching her name. If you think she is corrupted...attack that. Not her parentage, not her family and definitely not her womanhood.

It just says so much lesser about your manhood if you do......Shame on you.

The Facebook open graph timeline thingy....

WOW...i got on the new face book open graph timeline thingy...love it...Now my facebook page looks great...really...Any one who wants to do this first check out the article where this is explained and the how to doc link next.  I know a lot of you like me dont like changes...but then as I said before...I love facebook...i just want some advance notice so MZee (obviously Mark Zuckerberg) has given us some intro on it...and I have to agree...it is COOL and he has given advance notice...but then I jumped the gun and went and got it done on my profile. That should tell you how impressed I am. Of course if it screws up my app, I am gonna be one of the first to complain. But an hour (how long) and everything seems good....so let us see.

The all important article that suckered me....
http://edition.cnn.com/2011/09/26/tech/social-media/facebook-users-will-revolt-cashmore/index.html

And the how to article....
http://mashable.com/2011/09/22/how-to-facebook-timeline/#view_as_one_page-gallery_box2479

The magic SMS

I am one of those sappy people who are happy when etisalat welcomes me home or bids me farewell with a SMS. You should see the smile on my face...I mean you would think that the people at etisalat are just waiting for me to either board or alight a flight and shedding tears of joy or sorrow over it (oops I should have said sorrow and joy right..may be a slip of the tongue, but my friends will be quick to agree that the whole country would probably be shedding tears of joy at my departure).

Well, getting to the point....I AM one of those people.

But then qtel starts sending me welcome messages all the time. But I, more often than not, get a wee bit ticked off....considering that I have been usually in the country for nearly a few weeks before they realize that I am here.  I mean, can’t they even monitor when I am in an out? (Notice the fact, that I still think that this is to be their first priority). I mean what are they doing? On top of everything, when they send me such messages, I end up getting reminded how long I have been here and that sends me into another spiral of depression. So qtel, if you want, I can send you my flight details so that you keep track.

My very virtual "virtual life"

I am completely losing it (whatever "it” is). I try as hard as possible to keep in touch with my friends...I joined Facebook because that would help but even then you are up to date only when your friends keep up to date. What happens when they don't have the time to update statuses?

Obviously that can happen cause they are not an internet mad lonesome traveler who uses the virtual life on the world wide web as a substitute to an actual social life.  (ok ok…that could be me…I am not going to confess though)

And even then, you are dealing with the god damned news feed to keep you updated that sometimes the ones that don’t get published miss through the cracks.

I just found out that one of my closest friends in college had babies and I did not even know. I mean what kind of person am I that I missed that. My head must have been stuck up the wrong place cause she even put up the pics on facebook. I am at the moment forgiving myself by saying that I just found her recently after a long 4 years. 

But what I should be doing though is kicking myself for losing touch for 4 years.  Well if I don’t forgive myself, who else is gonna forgive me? Obviously not my friend.

Experiments with my camera

Me obviously....

So, like most people who are gadget crazy, I went and bought myself an SLR camera. Nikon obviously since everyone from my office boy to the expert photography websites recommended it and because the nikon guys told me that the camera is compatible with my old Canon photo printer.

I still have my tried and trusted Canon which I have no plans of abandoning until I am sure that my new born interest in bird photography is here to stay. (Believe me, I have my phases...so many told me I would grow out of it once i reached adulthood...obviously I am not there yet)

So with all that in mind, and a lot of lectures from my best buddy, I have managed to experiment with my camera. Here are the results of my first in house photo shoot of various bits and pieces in my borrowed hotel apartment.